AU’s best win in streak iced perfect season

By Joe McAdory

Of the 74 times Auburn won in my 98-game streak at Jordan-Hare Stadium, none were bigger than when it beat Alabama 22-14 in 1993. Why? Auburn hadn’t beaten Alabama in its last three tries, Alabama was the defending national champion, plus the win allowed the Tigers to close out its perfect season at 11-0. It was the icing on the cake. It wasn’t a bad game, either. Below are what I perceive as the rest of Auburn’s five-best wins in the streak.

2. Auburn 23, Florida 20 (2001): When you beat the No. 1 team in America, it’s a pretty big deal. I’ve never seen the stadium get so crazy. I suppose what made this win so special to Auburn was the fact that it wasn’t supposed to win at all. Not only did Auburn win, but it did so in dramatic fashion.

3. Auburn 10, LSU 9 (2004): Not only did the game conclude in climactic fashion, but this win could be signaled as the springboard to the Tigers’ 13-0 season. It gave Auburn the momentum it needed to whip Tennessee two weeks later and roll on from there. A loss in this game could have greatly changed the Tigers’ fortunes.

4. Auburn 38, Florida 35 (1993): Same deal as the LSU game above. Had Auburn not beaten Florida that day, it may have lost two more times in 1993. But the momentum gained and confidence earned from this victory propelled the Tigers to its perfect season. And had Calvin Jackson not intercepted Danny Wuerffel with the Gators on the brink of a 17-0 lead in the first quarter, this game could have been over early.

5. Auburn 18, Alabama 17 (1997): The Tigers needed this one to capture the SEC West crown, but overcame a 17-6 deficit in the second half to win by a field goal. It’s pretty cool when the Iron Bowl comes down to the final moment.

Next week: Auburn’s five-most memorable defeats during the streak.

Someone kill the yellow jackets

By Joe McAdory

If PETA wants to come after me for wanting to poison, torture, kill, whatever, the hundreds or thousands of yellow jackets that have infiltrated my yard, fine then. They’re everywhere and I can’t get rid of them.

I calmly follow a solo yellow jacket and hope to follow it back to the nest. Doesn’t work because the little suckers aren’t too fond of me and become hostile. I’m not into getting stung. Maybe I should wear one of those stupid bee suits for protection. Maybe I can find some bait and kill them that way. Then again, wouldn’t that just attract more?

I want my front yard back, even if the grass is dead. It’s my dirt. I paid for it. If the yellow jackets want to pay rent, then maybe we can reach a settlement.

One sip and Joe Greene isn’t mean

By Chris Sweigart

I love Coca-Cola. Always did. It’s the Real Thing. But almost as much as I love Coca-Cola, I loved its commercials. Below are my five-favorite commercials of all-time, two of which are from the Coca-Cola Company:

1. Mean Joe Greene: Who doesn’t love seeing a tough guy toss his jersey to a little kid after a big football game? Before the Coke, Mean Joe was just plain mean. A few sips later, he’s a teddy bear.

2. Bud-wei-ser: The King of Beers always comes up with the most creative commercials. Using animated frogs to send this subliminal message from the swamp didn’t make me want a tall cold one, but it was funny.

3. Where’s the beef?: This ad campaign was so strong with the woman’s question, I can’t remember what fast food chain it was. Oh yeah, Wendy’s.

4. Teach the world to sing: Oh yeah, millions of people joined hands across the globe, put flowers in their hair and sang in perfect harmony. Ahh, Coca-Cola will do that for you. Maybe the folks in North Korea and Iran need the Real Thing, then we can all get along.

5. Nothing but net: If I placed a bet on a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, there’s no way I’d miss a basket. Off the satellite dish, off the moving van, off a passing helicopter, through the gym window, off the scoreboard, nothing but net. Michael Jordan and Larry Bird were that good.

Best of the rest: The Keep America Beautiful campaign with the native American who cries over pollution; anything from ESPN’s SportsCenter; and Dunkin Donuts’ “time to make the donuts.“

Next week: My five-favorite golf courses.

Microscopic hitchhikers not welcome

By Chris Sweigart

Opened my car door this morning, and there they were ... hundreds of fire ants either wanting a lift across town or finding an all-you-can-eat buffet in the rear floorboard of my Pontiac. Now there are plenty of nutritious options available elsewhere. For instance, how about a neighbor’s garbage can? Our what about a protein-rich dead earthworm? And there’s plenty of vitamins and minerals in a hearty, unfinished bowl of cat food, which I’m sure exists somewhere nearby.

But no, they prefered the floor of my car. What was the bill of fare? A few crusty French fries, remnants of what used to be a burrito in a Taco Bell bag and crumbs of a Snack Wells cookie. I hope they enjoyed their gluttony free-for-all. I hope they filled their stomachs and satisfied themselves.

I fed them. Then I killed them.

AU’s win over No. 1 Florida was best game

By Chris Sweigart

Attending 98-consecutive football games at Jordan-Hare Stadium with ambitions of ending the streak at 100, I’ve comprised a list of the best games I’ve seen since the streak began in 1992. Choosing the five-best was tough as some great games failed to crack the list. Here’s my top five:

1. Auburn 23, Florida 20 (2001): I’ve never seen Jordan Hare Stadium more electric. You’ve got a big underdog hanging with the No. 1 team in America, a third-string running back giving Auburn a go-ahead touchdown early in the fourth quarter, teams see-sawing the lead, and a game-winning kick in the swirling wind. Good stuff.

2. Auburn 7, LSU 3 (2006): That was one heck of a slugfest. Wonder if some players are still bruised from it.

3. Auburn 37, Syracuse 34 (2002): This one took three overtimes to finish and lasted beyond midnight. Auburn overcame a 17-point deficit and used a 200-yard rushing performance from Carnell Williams to win.

4. Auburn 18, Alabama 17 (1997): You’ve got the Iron Bowl and a critical turnover that leads to the game-winning field goal. Great game.

5. Georgia 56, Auburn 49 (1996): This may forever be the highest-scoring game in Auburn history. It should be because it took four overtimes to settle.

Best of the rest: Auburn 38, Florida 35 (1993); Auburn 30, LSU 26 (1994); Georgia 26, Auburn 26 (1994); Auburn 22, Alabama 14 (1993); Auburn 31, Alabama 27 (1995); Auburn 28, Northeast Louisiana 24 (1996); Ole Miss 24, Auburn 20 (2003); Auburn 10, LSU 9 (2004); Auburn 23, Georgia 20 (2000).
Lots of great Georgia games, huh?

Next week: Auburn’s five-most memorable victories during the streak.