Microscopic hitchhikers not welcome

By Chris Sweigart

Published: July 25, 2007

Opened my car door this morning, and there they were ... hundreds of fire ants either wanting a lift across town or finding an all-you-can-eat buffet in the rear floorboard of my Pontiac. Now there are plenty of nutritious options available elsewhere. For instance, how about a neighbor’s garbage can? Our what about a protein-rich dead earthworm? And there’s plenty of vitamins and minerals in a hearty, unfinished bowl of cat food, which I’m sure exists somewhere nearby.

But no, they prefered the floor of my car. What was the bill of fare? A few crusty French fries, remnants of what used to be a burrito in a Taco Bell bag and crumbs of a Snack Wells cookie. I hope they enjoyed their gluttony free-for-all. I hope they filled their stomachs and satisfied themselves.

I fed them. Then I killed them.