SZVETITZ COLUMN: BEMC more than just concrete

Oh, I know what you think about me.

You don’t think I’ve heard you talk, snicker and giggle as you walked around, pointing out all my flaws.

You say I’m too old, too nasty, too cavernous — since when did being too big, too multi-functional become a bad thing?

You sneer at my exterior. My interior. My floors, ceilings and walls.

Sure, my concrete has cracks and my pipes are rusted. Yes, my classrooms held both current students and their grandparents.

My bathrooms do look like something out of a 1970s “made for elementary school” documentary about the safety of wearing goggles when you light a Bunsen burner.

You say I’m old. Well, I call it seasoned, not sorry.

But you can’t wait until I’m gone — ’til you can get over in the new arena across the street, where the seats are cushioned and the floors made of gold.

I know what you think about me. I’m no fool. I might have been born at night, just not last night.

Actually, it was Jan. 11, 1969. And now, 41 years later, it’s all but over. And you’re glad.

Shame on you.

If it weren’t for me, Elvis would have never had a chance to even leave the building. I’ve seen and done it all. How quickly you forget.

Sure, you say Beard-Eaves-Memorial Coliseum is past its prime. And after 41 years — 42 basketball seasons — you might be right.

But that doesn’t mean it’s OK. As “decrepit” and “out-of-date” as you think I am, I still am alive enough to feel. If you carve “Jimmy wuz here” in the back of one of my seats, do I not bleed?

You think I’m just all cinder block and steel?

Let’s not forget what I’ve done. Now, I’m not one to toot my own horn, but enough is enough. For every “wow, this place is terrible,” there have been just as many “wow, did you see that?” moments inside my concrete walls. And now, these walls are going to talk.

You think the future is bright with the new Auburn Arena? Well, what about the past? That’s nothing to shake a stick at. For 41 years, I gave Auburn — and anyone with a ticket — all I had.

I might not be a national treasure, but I’m more important than you think.

I’ve seen the Round Mound of Rebound. The Pistol. The Rifleman. The Stick.

I’ve seen the King. The Stones. The Boss. Tina Turner twice. Ike just once. Isaac Hayes. He was a bad ... shut your mouth.

I’ve seen Pete Maravich score 46 points on my opening night, a record that still stands for the most points by an opponent under my roof.

I’ve seen John Mengelt score 60 against Alabama — before a 3-point line — hitting 23-of-44 shots, both of which are still better than anyone else to ever step foot inside.

I’ve hosted NCAA Championships — wrestling and gymnastics.

I’ve seen both of my teams (the men and women) win SEC Championships.

I’ve had more than 12,000 fans in my belly more than once. Talk about heartburn.

I’ve seen Vickie Orr, Ruthie Bolton, Carolyn Jones and DeWanna Bonner.

I’ve seen Charles Barkley, Rex Frederick, Chuck and Wesley Person.

Even Bo Jackson. No he never played basketball — even though he could have. But he does come in quite frequently to watch games. He even spoke at graduation not too long ago.

I was going to ask for his autograph, but I couldn’t find a pen. Go figure.

I’ve had thousands and thousands of graduates walk across my floor, along with a few elephants when I hosted the circus.

Speaking of my floor, it’s seen everything from Converse All-Star sneakers to Air Jordans.

It’s also been TARTAN (which I’m still embarrassed about, kind of like your high school photos you dread to look at), hardwood and even ice.
Can you say Ice Capades?

Did you know Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band played here? That’s right. And only about 1,000 fans showed up. Suckers. I had a front row seat.

I saw some of the Allman and Doobie Brothers concerts. Oh, and Jimmy Buffett, too.

I’ve also hosted an NBA regular-season game. Take that, new guy.

And those are just the events I can remember. There have been so many others. You know what they say about age, the mind is the first thing to go.

But I do remember Wally Tinker scored the first basket in my history, and Wednesday night, after Auburn beat Mississippi State, he made the last.

Then they cut down my nets one final time.

I guess they’re going to put me out to pasture now, and head over to the next best thing, leaving me with my mortar and memories.

But, man, they are some good ones.

MIKE SZVETITZ is sports editor of the Opelika-Auburn News. He may be reached at mszvetitz@oanow.com or 737-2513.